...thoughts...

Sometimes I just don't know what to make of Life. One minute, all is well, and things finally make sense. The next, I get thrown a curveball and I was totally unprepared for it, and it hits me in the face.

The next few days or weeks [sometimes months] are spent contemplating the reasons for certain events and outcomes. I think... maybe there is a lesson to learn from all of this... maybe there is a different path I am supposed to have taken, and this was necessary to get me back on course... maybe this wasn't the right time for this particualr event... maybe...

It's like a plethora of events playing and constantly replaying mentally, but of course, the outcome is predetermined to suit ME. Consequently, despite the infinitely overwhelming thoughts, I end up back at square one ... no answers and more mental scenarios.

Maybe it's best to just try to accept what has happened and hope that all works out for the best in the end. Maybe it's best to grow that tough outer skin to avoid a repitition of events. Or just maybe rather than merely accept the situation, learn from it, get tougher, and be wiser for when anything remotely similar comes along. I guess character and state of mind will have a great part to play in whatever decision I ultimately make... and whether I conquer this abyssmally deplorable state I seem to find myself in....

~ Rads