...[hilarious stuff].... Driving like a trini

It have some ting dah yuh have tuh remember about bein ah Trini driver :

1. Green light mean GO, yellow light mean speed up, red light mean 'floor de gas an pray nutten eh hit yuh'

2. Only one hand shud be on de steering wheel at all times. De odder shud be used for holdin ah drink, eatin, diggin yuh nose, or (when not in use) just aimlessly hangin out de window.

3. De rearview and side mirrors dey for use as ah 3 way mirror tuh check yuh hair an makeup (yuh know how much oman I does see puttin on dey makeup an usin de mirrors ?)

3. De indicators is of no use tuh you. Just veer off de road wen yuh feel like makin ah turn. De driver in de back shuddah be watchin wey yuh was goin.

4. Stay away from large vehicles pullin trailers an wit de words 'MACK' ,'INTERNATIONAL', 'ERF', KENWORTH, OF PETERBILT on de grille....dey is death on wheels.

5. De speed limit is only ah number yuh had tuh remember tuh pass yuh regulations.

6. Wen de police pull yuh over, de only way tuh avoid ah strip search an ah ticket is 'Yes', 'No', and 'Officer'

7. Wen yuh drivin at nite, turn on yuh lites on de high beam tuh blind odder drivers comin in de opposite direction....ent dem doin it tuh you ??

8. Try an see how fast yuh cud 'drag off' from de lites in yuh B-13 so dah yuh cud say yuh discipline ah Ferrari dah was in de lane nex tuh yuh. Do dis even tho de Ferrari driver eh even notice yuh.

9. Yuh eyes shud be everywhere else, EXCEPT on de road. Dey shud be checkin oman, maccoin big car, tryin tuh see who drivin de Benz on de side, watchin out for ah watermelon/corn/doubles vendor.

10. De road only have one lane , an dem lines is only for decoration.

** no wonder why road accidents goin up so much eh?

[Taken from an email]